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8:37 p.m. - 2003-03-24 Anyway... yes, giddy. Giddy because we entertain each other endlessly online. Giddy because she might call me tonight, and we'll hear each other for the first time. Horny? Yes. And for once, my libido is being sparked by someone other than you-know-who (I'm paranoid about writing her name here. If you don't know who, e-mail me.) How ridiculous is it to have fantasies about a girl you've never met? I'm talking detailed fantasies. I mean, yes, I know it happens everyday; I know people fall for each other online, cyber with each other, whatever, but I still think it's ridiculous. To really like someone, you have to talk to them in person, see their movements, hear the way they make a joke, see the way they walk, the way they carry themselves. You need the whole package, not just the online persona and a few choice pictures. No one knows this better than me. I've met so many fucking LOSERS over the past few months: Bad dressers, slanted faces, groping hands, apathetic intentions. I've seen it all. So, yes, I feel foolish because I have a crush over someone I've only seen via webcam. So I am going to make this plea: Please, please, please let her be talkative, smart and easy-going over the phone. Let her have a sexy voice. Let her not talk too much or too little. Let her listen to me and laugh at my jokes. Let her call me again, but not too soon afterwards. And then, if/when we meet... let her be sexy, smell yummy and dress decently. Let her be polite, well-mannered, fun to be with and spontaneous. Let her lean in intently while I'm talking, pay half for dinner, put her arm around me but not try to kiss me. I know I'm asking for way more than I deserve... 
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